There are many puzzles and questions that have perplexed men through the course of time. I’ve thought not-very long and concluded there are three great mysteries:
– The creation and expansion of the universe
– The role and place of dinosaurs in Earth’s history
That list is not in any specific order, but I think we can all agree that last one is by far the most intricate and vexing of them all. Not one thing specifically, but the whole species of “women” has been a puzzle to men since creation; they’ve always been shrouded in mystery. Even in the story of the creation of man and woman, we’re faced with some sketchy business and missing pieces to the story: there is great detail and imagery in God gathering some dust, forming man’s shape and image, and breathing life into his nostrils.
Then God knocks Adam unconscious and he wakes up with a woman and a missing rib. End of story.
I’m telling you, something’s fishy…
Men, maybe it’s just one of those mysteries that we’ll never figure out this side of eternity (or the other side for that matter). I know I certainly don’t. I’ve had more than one occasion where that extra X chromosome has really thrown me off.
In the 5th Grade, I peaked in my bookworm phase and I had approximately 1,276 Accelerated Reading points that year (that’s not an exaggeration, but really, who keeps a record of their points?………..). We had an AR store where once during a 6-week period, we could go and “buy” items with our points. They had the coolest things at the time there, like mini-stereos, Beanie Babies, candy, etc. I actually bought books with my points. But once, feeling like a millionaire with money to flaunt on women, I invited a girl that I crushed on to come with me to the AR store. I swept my arm around the room and with great smugness told her to get whatever things she wanted. “Baby, just throw it in the bag. You can have whatever you liiiiike.” Fabolous and TI, eat your heart out.
She got a couple things. And then picked a different boy to date.
There was once a girl I really liked, and we were “talking” and all that other nonsense teenagers say when they’re dating. One day I sent her a poem I wrote for her; I was proud of it and thought she deserved my cheesy rhyming romanticism, and so with trepidation I emailed it to her. When a week had gone by and I didn’t hear back about it, I asked her if she ever got it. This is literally how the conversation went:
Me: “Hey! So, umm… did you get that thing I sent you?”
Girl: “Oh yeah, in that email? Yeah… I was wondering what that was…”
Me: “That was a poem I wrote for you!”
Girl: “Oh, is that what that was?….. *silence*…. A poem…….. *more silence*…… That’s cool. So what are you up to?”
I knew it wouldn’t last.
Maybe we’re not supposed to understand women. But maybe that’s the point. Maybe that’s what makes love and romance and pursuit such beautiful things we long for and celebrate. Getting to know the beautiful mysteries and delicate intricacies and wonderful history of that girl is the best part, isn’t it? Maybe you can never fully understand her because the moment you did, you would take her for granted and lose the intrigue. Because the moment you had her figured out, you would move onto something else to discover. And after all, who doesn’t love a good mystery?
Sometimes, in the midst of trying to figure out what it really is that women want, you run across a gem of a girl. Sometimes you find a pearl of great price. Treasure it. Treasure and love it and don’t forget the worth of that pearl, lest you lose it for someone else to find and appreciate. Because you will. And when you begin to take that pearl for granted, remind yourself that you were poor before you found her. Don’t throw your pearls before the swine. Don’t throw her away.
Valentine’s Day has just ended and I’ve heard many people express their differing opinions on the holiday: the person who is angry at commercialized chocolate love, the whiny single person, the sickeningly sweet love bird with her 200 quotes on love. Just go take a look at your Facebook timeline. I don’t think it’s that bad of a thing, why complain about celebrating a day to celebrate love?
But it reminds us that we don’t love just for the sake of it. We love because God loved us so deeply and pursued us so relentlessly that He sent Jesus to woo His bride to Himself. Jesus, who completely knows His messy bride and still loves her, and will continue to love her for eternity. That’s what Valentine’s Day and every lasting and non-lasting romantic relationship point to.
So look, I get it. They make our heads hurt, our hearts race, and our wallets light. But if your girl is that pearl, you keep at it. You pursue her and woo her and get to know her. And when you think you understand her, get to know her more, because you will never fully understand her. Boys, be men.
And women? Be gentle.
“There are three things that are too amazing for me,
four that I do not understand:
the way of an eagle in the sky,
the way of a snake on a rock,
the way of a ship on the high seas,
and the way of a man with a young woman.” – Agur, Proverbs 30:18-19