For Whom the Wedding Bells Toll

Take a big whiff. Come on. A sizeable sniff…

Do you smell it?

No, not your deodorant failing on you. Not what the Rock is cooking. Certainly not what your digestive system is cooking. Hmm… Here, how about this: go on Facebook and go through every single one of your 1,000 plus friends. See what’s new for them…

Ahh… Do you see it now? Do you see the trend? Do you see smiling couples and artsy photo shoots? Joined hands and joined hearts. That’s what I meant. That’s what is in the air. Marriage. Love. Ugh.

Within this last year, 90% of my friends have decided to get married. Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little, but it seems that way! Every week I hear of someone getting engaged or married. Friends from childhood, from church, from college. Long lost acquaintences, old crushes, and those people that I never really met but know via Facebook/Twitter, photos, and a slightly unhealthy amount of stalking. They’re all getting married and I have no reprieve from it! Cupid has been busting his bogus butt in letting his arrows loose, and they seem to be finding some sort of mark. But it isn’t even just weddings that I hear of! More and more people I know have become doe-eyed dears and fallen to the love bug (virus). There’s a relationship epidemic among us.

Now all this may lead you to conclude that I’m bitter about marriage and love and all that gooey stuff. Maybe a girl did me wrong. Maybe I’m jealous I’m not in that category. Nope, it’s not that. I’m actually really excited and proud for these people that are taking huge steps into maturity and commitment. Jealous of a beautiful thing as love? That’s kind of petty, isn’t it? I’m just taken aback by the burst of new couples this year, but this can probably be chalked up to the fact that I’m getting older, and thus my friends get older. And as you get older, what do you do? You get married.

I wish I could refer you at this point to my “Guide to Make a Relationship Last” or “7 Steps to a Godly Marriage” but I don’t have either of those. In fact, I could probably tell you what not to do, focus on, or look for in a relationship. How to make it not work. I would just have to look at my past.

… This is kind of awkward.

“There you go! He is bitter! He’s just venting about it and calling it a ‘blog’”

I stand by what I said, to see my friends tie the knot is exciting and joyful. But I’ve honestly grown and learned more about what it looks like to be in a relationship, especially one that glorifies God. I thought I knew it before. But God has a way of shaping and humbling you, and doing it constantly. Maybe you’re under the persuasion that a relationship that “glorifies God” simply means that you both go to church. I’d disagree, but I’m not here to present the theological views on what a Biblical marriage (or relationship headed toward marriage) looks like. That would be akin to a pilot giving a flying lesson without ever having a succesful take-off and landing sequence.

I’m not sure if or when I’ll look down the aisle to see a blushing bride walking toward me to join me in covenant. I’m certainly in no hurry. But I hope that if that day comes, I remember that my relationship is to mirror the marriage of Christ with the Church. (Big “C” Church, the universal body of believers) It is a covenant of sacrifice, humility, mission and love. Love that is not defined or identified merely as a “spark” or swapping of pheremones, but as a commitment centered on the person and work of Jesus Christ. I hope in that day, I remember that I am to honor her and love her and pursue her as Christ pursues His bride. I hope to not just remember these thing, but to do them.

But that day has not come. So till then, I’m content with hearing the music of everyone else’s wedding bells.